Belinder & Peixian

JunQin & Jianwei

Peiru & Racheal

My "girls" @ Y Hub

JingEn, Matthew & Jianyuan

Matthew my Fav boy

The most kind hearted boy in Y Hub

Thanx for e lesson & e memory

Im feeling better now after weeks of unspoken discomfort. Perhaps Im someone who read far too much into things that are as simple as pure friendship, or 1 + 1. This perhaps is my weakness which I need to overcome. The stress from e new Counselling course,closure of Y Hub & some growing up things affected mi a great deal e few weeks. "Being too emotional doesnt realie help matters or people". This has alwaz been a constant reminder from my manager cum mentor cum friend - Mark. Now then do I realise his wisdom behind those words.

All along I felt that my emotions (tons of it) is my strength, which is something that will help me in my future role as a counsellor. It was until this matter that happened (how foolish am I) that allowed me to take a clearer view of myself. I had overestimated my own feelings @ times. I apologise 2 e ppl who had been affected due 2 my uncontrolled emotions, like Ben (lotz of it), Clarence (quite alot), Jere & Chang (sometimes).& to my family who have been getting e worse of mi when they didnt deserve them. All of a sudden, I felt that Ive grown quite a lot. A paradigm shift. Its neva too late to find out more about yourself @ 23 huh.

It is somewhat true that a person would have yet experience life if he has yet experience failure. Previously, those were words unclear to mi, couldnt realie grasp e gist of it. Now i do. Ive juz experienced 1, & a great fall somemore, but im grateful to that fall. A fall that can make mi into a better person. A fall that challenged mi to pick up my courage to clarify things that didnt make mi feel good. In e past, i would have kept mum & sit @ one corner sulking (nah). Im grateful to u, yes u, who had given mi a very memorable 1 week or so, tat it was truly one of my happiest time in my life. A great lesson was taught by you to me, telling me that many things in e world are not as complicated as i thought them to be. Things can really be pure & simple.

Thank you for ur listening ears & ur encouragements. They were precious. I will try to be a more positive person than being too emotional.

I think i better go thru more counselling sessions now b4 i counsel others, ha.

Finalie, i can sleep well.

Haiz. Vexed. It hurts.

Y Hub is gonna close down, confirmed yesterdae after e board meeting. After 2 yrs @ Jurong East, this "home" to many Y Hub kids will be gone foreva......

Though it didnt go in e direction as proposed by HQ -- to be a mini YMCA bursting with programs & activities -- it definitely had made a great deal of difference to many people. I am one of them.

I dun noe how 2 break e news to e Y Hub kids, who see Y Hub as their 2nd home -- a place for them to meet with friends, to do homework, to have fun with kor kor. I wonder how much an impact it will be on them? As much as it has impacted mi? I question myself if my presence @ Y Hub these past 9 months did make any difference to the people who had come, even if its a little. I dun noe how i should react? -- To embrace this news with optimism, that HQ will no longer have to bear e losses incurred by Y Hub, or feel as sad as e kids will becoz we have all lost our common "home".

I will miss those good times I had with e kids, & those valuable lessons & experiences I gained from them. Jingxuan, JunQin, Pan Liang, Matthew, Racheal, Pei Xian, Pei Ru, Belinder, RongFong, Kelvin, Samuel, Shuhui, Cassandra, Jeremy. & those volunteers who had given their love & passion to e kids, I will miss them also -- Yvonne, Magdalene, XiangTing, Wan Sean, Alfred, Jonathon, Josef, Wan Xin....

It realie hurts e most when u fall from e highest point in life. She has inflicted a wound so deep, which I dun noe when it will ever recover.... I shouldnt have climbed to e highest point in e 1st place. I shouldnt even have thought of trying.

Looking Back @ 2005

Jan: Left SIM
Became a freelance instructor
Participated in 2 Sec sch camps
Started teaching tution 2 a P6 ACS boy
Participated in Surf n Sweat -- Paiseh myself when shorts dropped off

Feb: Submitted application to NIE
Participated in Vertical Marathon -- Got 6th place (shd haf been better)
Participated in Amazing Race -- Ran like mad 4 nothing
Officially joined as YMCA-APSN committee member

Mar: Participated in X Physique --Almost got myself & chang drown in e KallangRiver
Participated in Legs n Paddle-- Overate & had cramps & stitches during run
Started taking shifts in taking care of grandpa
Started training for swimming for my NIE PE test

Apr: Took e PE test & failed -- Becoz of swimming,sobz
Started work @ Y Hub
Acted as a day guide to 30 Korean Students

May: Wanted 2 give up @ Y Hub coz it was truly 2 challenging,esp e problematic kids
Took e PE test again & passed, yeah
Finally saw e true characters of Cassandra
Organised a bbq but turned out 2 be my bdae celebration,got 2 ex watches
Went for NIE interview

Jun: Big revamp @ Y Hub, saw e massive drop in e kids coming 2 Y Hub
Attended CHC
Went for 6 days of reservist. Erm, quite a waste of time
Kena rejected by NIE -- Was utterly disappointed
Went for Y Camp Challenge @ AES--Fun & challenging, memorable

July: Developed close relationships with a few Y Hub kids
Took up a fund raising project abandoned by e project leader
Wrote my 1st sponsorship letters-- 50 in all, but only 1 accepted in e end
Due 2 e shortage in manpower & challenges in e project, it was dropped
Sounded out by Children Cancer Foundation & APSN to join their organisation
Received my 1st lecture from Mark regarding my work attitude
Organised e 1st gathering @ Y Hub. Y Camp Challenge post camp gathering
Participated in MILK Run & got 2nd.Almost lost 2 a 13 yr old boy, phew.
Attended my 1st CG meeting

Aug: Acted as a day guide to 25 Hongkong kids. Made some friends.
Accepted Christ-- Hallelluja
Organised e best APSN outings so far @ Y Hub.Spent 3 hrs 2 plan treasure hunt.
1st time 2 e Night Safari & Snow City. Both FOC!
Decided to take e Counselling Course
Took up guitar class

Sep: Organised nite cycling & a miracle happened.
4 volunteers came after my prayers. & they remained committed till now.
Received my 2nd awakening lecture from Mark
Organised e Mooncake Festival party.Got pissed off by e kids

Oct: Had a hard time @ Y Hub after Jeremy & Cassandra got into trouble respectively
Completed a song i wrote in Sec 4, complete with guitar chords
Received my 3rd lecture from Mark
Went to COH camp
Gave Huiyin a special gift for bdae -- a cheque!
1st Y Hub visit to Bukit Batok Home for e Aged

Nov: Started planning for Y Hub Children's camp. Wrote letters till i became sick
Finally got 2 nods from 2 companies. SWCDC oso willing 2 support camp, yeah.
Cassandra & Jeremy went on court
Had some fun times with e kids when shopping for items for camp
2nd visit to BB Home
Got accepted by Edith Cowan for e Counselling Course
Wrote my 5th song -- San Nian

Dec: Half Marathon. Bettered last yr's timing by 3 mins.
Y Hub Camp -- Was touched by e Y hub kids & oso e Down's Syndrome kids
Heard e worst of comments from Mark on my closeness with e Y Hub kids. Sadz
Y Camp Challenge -- A truly challenging but fulfilling event. Knew Lynette.
Had my happiest time spent on msn. Unforgettable conversations.Wonderful.
Brought Clare & Ben to CHC
Countdown to 2006 @ home, after watching Narnia on com, haha.